No, not this girl. Once again I have posted a gratuitous toddler picture just because I invented her. She's lovely and dictatorial, just the way she should be.
Here's the thing. I think people have been trying to send me a message. A message in a not so subtle way because sometimes I need to be slammed over the head to get a message.
I am attending a party this weekend, (Ok my husbands and I!) and I have to find an outfit - not dressy dressy and not too casual casual. There lies the rub. I had a lovely sundress in a beautiful sky blue that was elegant, demure and pretty. I brought it in to work to show my boss who agreed that it was elegant, demure and pretty but not..... celebratory enough. She said I had to step it up. My other officemate told me that I had to take one step outside of my comfort zone and to start channelling my inner Angelina. Ha! I mentioned this to Alan who totally agreed and that was when the revelation occurred. I'm staid. Boring. Sportyish. Whenever I tried on a top with a low neckline I asked Alan if it looked slutty. He would laugh and say you are not even near the postalcode of slutty! Well dammit the gauntlet has been thrown.
My boss, (aka harbinger of good taste and knowledgable of all that is fashionable) said she was taking me to Holts and we would find the appropriate celebratory outfit. I followed in her wake and awaited what was to be found. Lucky for me I had a healthy sized gift certificate (from lovely aforementioned boss) and the now or never sale was on. We went spelunking in the racks and came up with some great stuff. A Diane Von Furstenburg top and Ralph Lauren bottoms. The top was not just one step out of my comfort zone but two. It is fabulous and low cut and shows off the girls way more than I normally would. Part of me said - screw it, I've always played safe and I'm turning 40. As soon as I got back to work I thought, Oh jesus what have I done?
In actuality it just shows some cleavage but I guess I'll live. Maybe when I answer the door at the party I can say, " hello, my breasts welcome you and I do too!" " If you need anything just ask my breasts and they'll get them for you! They are great multitaskers.
Wish me luck while I attempt to appear comfortable. And hey - all you chicks who know me and read this, please play along!
2 comments:
oh dear, does that mean I'm going to have to have someone take me out in a wheelchair shopping ???
or worse, order on-line with a 1 day delivery !!!
stressssss !!!!!!!
let me see, what matches a grey boot cast ????
For many many years, I wondered if you actually had 'girls'... and what to my wondering eyes should appear? but two voluptuous beauties in all their glory. In fact it was only a smidgen of what was there, but since they previously had been hidden like you had adopted Hijab (I just mean covered - well covered!) a smidgen seemed like Mount Rushmore relatively speaking. Only these weren't the heads of past presidents... more a celebratory awakening of your Womanhood... finally! How many times did I see you in 90 degree weather in a turtleneck? Ok well maybe only twice, but still they do make bathing suits without collars you know!
I'd like to officially welcome you to the sexy and 40 stage - you are the epitome of hotness! Blonde, sexy, voluptuous... could I show you some houses?
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