Look! I've been talking about doing this for over a year and my husband never believed I would do it. I like nothing better than proving him wrong so I am now officially taking the plunge.
I will be writing about things in my life and things that are of interest to me. This is something that I am doing just for me. As all parents can understand, something for yourself is a bit of an anathema so I have decided to try to let go of my people pleasing nature (lordy am I ever a pleaser) and just write to please myself. If you find things you don’t agree with then feel free to say so or if you find something offensive then please feel free to just go away. Really! Also please stop reading now if you can’t handle swearing because god almighty there shall be swearing. I’m not a big cusser in real life but in my thoughts I can be as salty as a longshoreman after a particularly bad catch. Please know that I do know how to be socially appropriate and not swear in front of polite company, my grandmother, and my children. Wait. I do swear quietly behind my children’s backs when they are being particularly difficult but they are none the wiser. I actually once flipped my son the bird behind his back after a heinous display of selfishness on his part but he never saw that either.
I should mention that I will be using my real name but I will be changing the names of my family members and maybe some others because why should they have to suffer at the hands of their talkative wife, mother etc.
The following are the people who play a large part in my life:
Thomas my husband is a whole four months older than I. He has worked for the same company for eighteen years and has only ever called in sick once. This must tell you something about him. Sometimes I secretly call him hospital corners. He is tall, dark, and handsome in a good way because he doesn’t know it. I find this comforting. He also is a newshound as am I and we love to try to scoop each other. Just yesterday he called me on my cell and said, “Calgary School bus crash, and bombs in Karachi aimed at Benazir Bhutto, I win!” We also both love reading and history and we have a very strange affinity for historic battlefields. I think this is a good thing as we will have something to talk about when we are eighty whereas some beautiful people will have nothing once everything starts to go south.
Henry my son is 5 years old. He is loving and chatty and challenging and our secret nickname for him is sweet bastard. My son’s victories are very hard won. This child never stops speaking from the second he wakes up until the second he falls asleep. May I take a second to apologize to my late parents whom I must have put through unadulterated hell because I never stopped talking either. I know Karma when I see it and my parents are laughing with glee somewhere in heaven. Henry is ahead of his peers in verbal expression but is behind in terms of emotional development. We have had this damn kid tested every which way till Sunday and all the professionals report that he is totally fine but is a bit behind emotionally and has a persistent personality which makes parenting difficult. No kidding. As tough as it is being his parent he comes out with things that are pretty darn delightful. Just last week he ran up to me and reported that we are upper middle class and then skipped upstairs in search of goldfish crackers. I recently found him colouring a yellow face and trying to be the engaged interested parent I asked him if he was drawing a smiley face. After straining himself with a huge eyeroll he said, “no mom! It’s the death mask of Agamemnon.” We’re totally screwed.
Chloe is 16 months old and a delight that lurches around our house like a drunken sailor and bumps into walls all willy nilly. I don’t know if it is a girl thing or a second child thing but she is much more relaxed and easy going. Then again she is not yet two and has never done anything to really tick me off but I’m sure that will come in the future. In the meantime I will enjoy her chubby sausage arms and drooly kisses.
Well this is a start and on some level I feel I need to explain why I am starting to write a journal. On second thought, in the spirit of trying not to always be a people pleaser I shan’t explain, I’ll just write.
Hopefully I will have some interesting stuff to report as I am off to the Ritz in Montreal on Sunday for a conference and oh what a treat that will be.
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