Thursday, May 29, 2008

People are strange..........








I was just thinking this morning about people’s idiosyncrasies. Things that are specific only to them that make them who they are. I have a number of things that most people would think are strange. Let me share them with you and you can decide.


Things about me that are strange.

Some will be stranger than others but here goes.

I like ice cubes in my skim milk.

I am afraid of Squirrels. Seriously. A girlfriend once made me a squirrel cake for my birthday! When I was a kid I had a recurring dream of a squirrel biting me on my right hand and I had to shake my hand like crazy to get it off. I’ve been waiting for this incident to occur in real life for over 25 years now. Last summer a squirrel ran down from a tree and sort of headbutted me in the ankle. You should have heard the screaming. (Me, not the squirrel.)

I count the number of buttons on remote controls.

I count the number of stairs on every staircase I climb.

I hate eggs. (except for the kind that assists in the making of cake!)

I talk in my sleep. (it’s never-ending!)

I always have to have toilet paper on the roller so the paper comes from over the top, not underneath. One day the toilet paper came from underneath and a very bad thing happened that day. I’ve actually thought that the bad thing might not have happened if I had placed the toilet paper on the roll properly. (I told you strange).

I worry in the middle of the night. Not panic attacks or anything but I start creating lists like: Call this person, Make sure to write those letters a work. Don’t forget Charlie has show and tell tomorrow. Buy stuff for the barbeque – what am I going to make for the barbeque? Do we need more relish? This goes on and on until I get to bigger things – have I called Grandma enough? Am I a bad granddaughter? I don’t know how this happens but everything gets so BIG in the middle of the night. Alan’s theory is that if you can’t do anything about stuff in the middle of the night then just go to sleep. Ah, men, everything is so simple. It’s like they have boxes in their head. You know, the work box, the marriage box, the children box. And when they are done with a particular item they can just close the box. Voila! Also men can only deal with one box at a time. Sort of like, “of course I couldn’t tidy the house, I was watching the children.” Women never close their boxes and all boxes are totally interrelated. Okay enough with the boxes.

I don’t have a big gang of friends. I have a small number of very close friends who know absolutely everything about me. Everything. (Have I scared you Alan? Heh).

I am able to see things in shades of grey. Not everything is black or white. The one thing that I am totally clear about is that I cannot abide people who are unkind. I also have no time for really angry people. I always remember when my Mom was ill – she said not to treat life like a dress rehearsal. This is the once chance we get. So I guess sitting around taking nonsense from an angry person is one thing I really don’t need nor want.

I can’t whistle.

I dance by myself all the time. I especially do this when tidying the kitchen. Alan is used to catching me doing this on a regular basis. It remains embarrassing every time.

I’m not afraid to kill any type of bug that needs killing. The fear of them running around scares me more.

I startle very easily. Weekly you will hear me scream if Alan all of a sudden pops up in a doorway.

Whenever I get really upset I throw up. According to my Doctor I’m literally a gut reactor.

I need to learn how to relax. My father once said that if I ate coal, I would poop diamonds. Clearly I need to do more yoga.

I read on average four books a week. I read before bed, I read if I am awake early. If I can’t sleep I will read for a couple of hours in the middle of the night. I regularly re-read books if I enjoyed them in the past.

I hate libraries because they don’t display books like in a bookstore. The books I want are always out and I always forget to return them because they get absorbed into my humongous bookshelf.

My favourite gift is a Chapters gift card. Hands down.

I have very little jewelry but what I have is real. This leads me to another issue – I am incapable of properly accessorizing. I am an accessorizing retard. That is why I don’t have much jewelry. I need a friend to tell me if something looks good.

I have clothes in my closet that range from a size 12 to a size 0. My husband says I have tons of clothes. Currently I have 3 pairs of pants that fit me so that is totally untrue. Clearly I need to purge to show how few clothes I have that I can wear.

I still sort of leap into bed when I get in at night. I have residual fears of the boogieman under my bed. At least I don’t run and jump like I used to. Oh wait! If I turn off the lights in the basement I still do run up the stairs.

It freaks me out when my son stands on his head as I am sure his neck will break.

I’m not afraid of being alone overnight in the house.

I’m very good at crying. Commercials can make me cry. I routinely mist up when I am in a card store.

I love real Parmigiano Reggiano cheese. I have routinely ripped off the price tag so my husband won’t notice that I spend like 12 bucks a week on Parmigiano cheese. I have just fessed up to this behavior this week. But then again hey – he has expenses at the tennis club, I can have my cheese (and eat it too!) .

I love bouncing on Trampolines.

I occasionally have a thought that if I called my old home phone number that my mother or father might pick up. Hey – Dennis Quaid did it in “Frequency” why can’t it happen to me?

Wow – I could go on and on. I really am very strange. Tell me about your strange stuff. See that thing below that says comments? Use it! (Kathy does. Hi Kathy! Lets all try to be like Kathy).



4 comments:

stephanie said...

Look! I left a comment myself. See how easy it is? What do you want? A cookie? I can give you a cookie.

Anonymous said...

Oh dear you have really put me on the spot. I did type a rather witty reply, unfortunately I went to publish and it wouldn't take and erased everything. I shall try to re-create my humour.

I too have some strange "qualities". I also keep myself awake at night WORRYING. It also starts with things like relish, but works its way into "hm, I've had a back ache for the past couple of days, OH MY GOSH I think it's a tumour!" Kind of wacky, I know.

I also do the counting thing. Usually when I'm out on a walk or run. I count one to ten, then one to ten, and then one to ten. You get the idea. Or I'll spell. Things like the street name, over and over. Or the make of a car, over and over.

I hate food on my plate touching. My mother jokes that I should be eating off a baby plate. Just drives me nuts.

I am borderline neurotic about when I entertain. I MUST have everyting just so. So much so I prepare for days and by the time I have the people over, I'm exhausted. Drives my spouse nuts too. (me being neurotic, not the entertaining part).

I HAVE to have everything cleaned up before I go to bed at night. The dishes all done and put away, the clothes washed and put away. The baby's bottles, check. Baby food ready, check. Coffee on timer check. I can't sleep if it's not all prepared and spotless.

I can't stand red carnations. YUCK YUCK YUCK. Reminds me of my grandfather's funeral, and they are just plain UGLY.

I'm sure there are many many more "issues" that I suffer from, but I do appreciate the opportunity you have given me to dwell on them. I have to run, I have to clean so that I can go to bed and worry all night about my brain. Maybe I need to go and buy some relish.

Kathy

Anonymous said...

oh ya, when I actually do go to bed, and my feet are cold, I can't ever wear anything but white socks. Dark socks, NO ! I would go without instead.

I truly am sitting here thinking of more, I'm sure I'll have another comment by the end of the evening.

Kathy

stephanie said...

Oooohh good one! Thou shalt not wear dark socks to bed. I can only wear white ankle socks to bed if socks are needed.

I too an neurotic about entertaining but am really trying to overcome that. I once had dinner at a friends whose house was sorta untidy and we just ordered in but it was so much fun. The less fuss the better sometimes. Esp. with kids.